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Wednesday, August 20, 2014

Bisaya jokes 17, 2014

Teacher: class kung basura ko asa man ko ninyo ilabay, sa nabubulok or sa di nabubulok?
Dong: aw sa di nabubulok maam!
Teacher: ngano man Dong?
Dong: aw alang-alang maam, plastik man ka!

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Bahala’g saging Basta loving Mag unsa mana ang adobo Kung si mister o si misis daghang sikreto? Bahala’g nagpuyo sa payag Basta ang nawong pirmi hayag Mag unsa manang mansion Kung ang bana naay laing pamilya nga extension? Bahala’g pobre Basta sige lang ug ngisi Mag-unsa manang dato Kung sige lang ug kasuko Daghang bisyo.
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MANAGER: Dawat kana. Unang buwan nimo nga sweldo Php 5,000. After 6 months Php 15,000 na. APPLICANT: Sir tenk you kaayo! Sir, after 6 months na lng ko sulod?? hahaha…

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haha kaning isdaa bisaya...tan awa...

Tuesday, August 12, 2014

Bisaya jokes 16, 2014


  video
These videos are a copies of a publicly shared videos in facebook. If these are yours and want it taken down please let me know. pero bisdak kaayo ni nga mga video ba. nakahilak gud ang babaeng artista kay wala man uban sa shooting ang iyang pagka dive sa tubig. hahahahahhahaha!

Kaning kaluoy jud pero katawanan kaayo. Kiat!

  video



Monday, August 4, 2014

Bisaya jokes 15, 2014

Bisaya kang Dako kung:


1. You feel insulted when a non-Bisdak ridicules someone by saying “Bisaya”, but it’s okay if another Bisdak uses it to another Bisdak, as in “ah, Bisayaa sab oy!”

2. You feel proud when Matud Nila is sung and you sing along with it bisan dili nimo memorize.

3. Hibal-an nimo kung unsa ang “habal-habal” bisan wala pa ka kasakay niani.

4. Common usages kung ga-tinagalog: the use of “kuwan” as interjection, ang superlative nga pirmi gamiton mao ang “masyado”, i.e., maingay masyado, sobra masyado, bilisan mo masyado (read: paspasi lagi) adunay tendency nga pulihan lang ang “o” or “a” og “i”, i.e., ang atop into atip, ang kan-on into kan-in, ang sud-an into sud-in ug ang utan into utin)

5. You know what “itlog mo ‘noy orange” means.

6. You know that the karaang “bayle” aron mahimong modern gipulihan na og “disco” (discoral).

7. Aduna kay hibaw-an nga at least usa ka kanta ni Yoyoy Villame or Max Surban bisan sa tono lang.

8. You can use varied terms of endearment for friends and relatives like bay, parts, paparts, migo, parekoy, pareng, choy, higala, kid, gaw, gaweks, manoy, nong, inse, ditse, iyo, iya, palangga, pangga, gang.

9. You call someone “Inday” and/or “Dodong” as a term of affection and hate it when other non-Bisdaks use the term as if its a title given for a househelp.

10. You know what “maninghag” is?

11. You know Vino Kulafu and Fighter Wine…sometimes you even know their jingles!

12. Instead of Stork, you chose Snowbear or you buy Timbura when you mean Corniks.

13. You’re familiar with the brand Loalde in clothing.

14. You crave for inun-unan, paklay, ginamay, halang-halang, kinilaw, ginamos, buwad, binignit„ sikwate paresan sa puto maya.


15. Esteban Escudero and Golyat are folk heroes. bisaya jokes, bisaya joke, bisaya

16. “Handumanan sa Usa Ka Awit” is closer to your heart than “Maalaala Mo Kaya” TV show.

17. At …pag-nagulat-nabigla ang mga Bisdak ang biglang sigaw ay “ay bilat” o kaya “ay otin sa kabayo”

18. SUTUKIL is as common as TAPSILOG; in fact you know that SUTUKIL came first.

19. Your common pulutan for tuba drinking is “TARGET” - asin nga targeton lang nimo sa imong tudlo.

20. You have at least once in your lifetime experienced “Ang Mysterio sa Paglawig sa Barko Padulong Manila”, a phenomenon that when the boat is approaching Manila, everybody around you suddenly becomes Tagalog speaking nga adtong miaging adlaw lang pwerting Bisaya pa ninyo!

21. You whisper Bisaya to a fellow Bisdak in the midst of a Tagalog crowd …and he replies loudly to you in Tagalog!

22. The first question you ask when you found out that someone is Bisdak, “taga-asa man diay ka?”

23. You usually use the warning phrase ” Hala Ka”!

24. You know the meaning and proper usages of the following (irreverent) words/phrases: pesteng yawa, usapa na, pastilan, lat-inanag, butalo, way kurat, hastang, puslan man, buing, kuwangol, libod-suroy, ligas-paka, way kuha, ka-ubo, kolera, burikat, duha singko, balang, palag, wa ka kyapi?, ok pas olrayt, haybol, ang pahak!, jer-jer, way blema, pagarpar, giro, kalandrakas, ambot sa langaw pilay idad sa ok-ok, bugnawg simod, bagdok, gi-atay!, gi-ahak, gibangkong, tibak (tiguwang bakla), NPA (nawong puros agtang), tira pasagad, basin diay pilay pad sa ungoy, banat kay awaaw, mat-an pas pinya, ngitngit pas alkitran, tak-om pas tuway, malalim mo na!, sus!

This is from:
http://bototay.tumblr.com/



Wednesday, July 23, 2014

Bisaya jokes 14, 2014


Anak: Tay, akong mga klasmet nasero sa test ganiha?
Tatay: Unya ikaw anak?
Anak: Aw, palupig ba gud ko. Sero pud!
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TEACHER: Unsay atong pambansang Ibon?
BOY: Chicken?
TEACHER: Dili! brown ang kolor ani!
BOY: Fried chicken!
TEACHER: Dili! Mas gamay sa chicken.
BOY: knoRR CHIcken cubes?
TEACHER: GAWAS!
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Nag field trip si Juan…)

TEACHER: (pointing to a deer in the zoo) Juan, unsa man na nga animal?
JUAN: Wala ko kabalo, mam.
TEACHER: Unsay tawag sa imong Tatay sa imong Nanay?

JUAN: TARANTADO di ay tawag ana, Ma’am?


The bisaya jokes, bisdak jokes, binisaya jokes you'll find in this blog are not entirely mine. They are from different sources in the net. This blog once again is a compilation of these kinds of jokes. If you have any complaints or if I have posted something you don't like posted because it is yours please email me. Thanks.